Sadness continued

Well our sad times didn't end with Buddha.  I had not even quite digested the fact that he was gone and our breeding program had to rely on his offspring, that we lost another buck.  This time it happened to be the most special buck we had bred.  Not that his type was the most exceptional, however he did throw some nice babies.  His personality was one in a million.  He loved to be loved.  He lived in an outdoor pen.  It had a flat roof on it for shelter.  He would jump up on top as soon as we came outside and await his love.  If you ignored him he would stand on his hind legs and sit upright begging.  He even got my husband in on the love.  He never went without noticed.  He spent a solid year in his pen with the full option to run free had he chose to.  But he didn't.  He was happy with the obstacles and safety.  Then one of our last big storms, something happened.  Not quite sure what enticed him to leave his pen but he did.  Sadly our puppy was elated to go out and find a friend to play with in the yard.  The bounding 65 pound puppy love was too much for Rudy to endure.  
I sit and think back, I never should have kept him outside.  But then I think he was so happy out there.  Then I think I should have kept a solid roof on his pen.  But then I think, he couldn't have jumped up and interacted with all of us like he did.  He was able to have such a fun relationship with us.  All I can do now is be thankful for that time and hope to meet another as sweet and amazing as he was in my lifetime.  The only consolation is that we have a darling Rudy junior buck growing and 3 Rudy does.  He has also left us with Vader and Hooch who both have very darling personalities.  As far as letting them express themselves in an outdoor pen I've decided nobody gets free time quite the same anymore.